Da bLoG

One day, while me and my groupmates were paying attention to the bimbingan, someone asked me

“Kamu orang Malaysia ya dek(you’re a Malaysian)?”

“Iya.”

And he went on asking about tarian pendet(balinese dance).

Later the same morning, in the operating theater, another person asked again if there’s anybody else whose Malaysian other than the obviusly Malysian Mr.R and Ms.H.I kept still until H pointed at me and say “Itu orang Malaysia.”

Damn you!

I went on by shaking my head and say “Nggak, nggak dok. Saya bukan orang Malaysia (No, no doc. I’m not a Malaysian).”

Each time someone asked me the question, an Indonesian friend of mine will say “Sabar ya Yati…” and we’d both laugh about it.

Yes, you might say I’m selfish to save myself by saying that and let my other friends deal with whatever it was, but understand that saving oneself is a basic primal instinct of a typical human being. And besides, if I can get away with it, why not? Well, looking like an Indonesian has its own advantage. And when they say that I don’t look like a Malaysian, instead I look like an Indonesian, I took it as a pleasantly compliment.

I found out from my friend while we were chatting that afternoon that the latest Visit Malaysian ads has shown some balinese dancer in front of Petronas Twin Towers. So, here we go again. Everytime they made a mess, we (the students studying in Indonesia) were the ones who have face their mockery. Mana la tau kot-kot orang yang buat iklan ni baru graduate dari sekolah luar negeri, dah lama giler tak balik Malaysia.Time kena bagi tugasan ni dia tanya kawan dia:
“Eh, tarian pendet tu tarian Malaysia ek?”
“Alaa, aku tengah sibuk ni. Cube carik kat memane ke….”
Sebab dia malas nak carik info, dia pun buat je la. Pastu, atasan dia yang sibuk giler nak mampus pun main approve je.

“Ahh, takde masa ni. Saya sign je la ek.”

Point is:isu2 beginian, bukan salah kita. Kita cuma dtg ke sini untuk menuntut ilmu,selain meluaskan lingkungan sosial. Bukan mau bikin masalah, cari gara2, dll. Note that we’re not particularly proud of what have been done, but surely, there has got to be more to life than having a grudge on each other.

Dari 1st year sampai sekarang, ada je isu.

Isu Ambalat, isu pembantu rumah tangga kena dera, isu batik, isu minyak (Ya Allah, isu harga minyak naik pun salahkan kitorang jugak), isu Manohara, isu ManU batal trip diorang ke Indonesia, sampai isu kecik2 macam tu.

Often I have been asked

“Kenapa sih, Malaysia tuh mau ngambil Ambalat/batik/_____(sila isi tempat kosong)”

Laa, kau tanye aku, mana aku tau. Kau nak amik balik pulau tu, ameklah. Aku dah bertahun dok kat sini. I don’t follow-up Malaysian updates as often as I follow-up patients.Siapakah artis Malaysia yang paling hot sekarang? Last time aku check Siti Nurhaliza. Tu dulu laa, sekarang tak tau laa pulak. Perdana menteri Malaysia ganti pun aku dapat tau dari kawan Indonesian aku.

“Eh, Yatt. PM Malaysia ganti kan?”

“Lho? Iya ya? Ga tau nih. Udah lama ga nge-update berita dari Malaysia.”

Dan batik, batik berasal dari negara India (menurut kata kawan aku yang jawab camtu masa ditanya. Ahay, aku pun baru tau daa. Maklum, Sejarah dapat C masa SPM dulu). Apakata kita pegi tanya sama2 orang-orang asal negara India. Takpun, kita sama-sama buat demo kat depan kedutaan India. Together we march with signboards saying “Batik is ours!” Lagipun, corak batik Malaysia dan Indonesia kan tak sama. Masing-masing ada identitas sendiri.

Manohara? She can’t even speak Indonesian well. Nuff said. Padan muka prince tu, saper suroh kawin ngan budak-budak.

Man U trip cancelled to Indonesia because of the bombing issues. Mati kebosanan dan mati kepanasan lerr ManU players dok lama2 kat Malaysia tu.Hahaha!

So, here’s the awful truth. 

From our early days in Jatinangor, tiap kali ada isu Malaysia-Indonesia tertampallah poster-poster di dinding campus “Ganyang Malaysia/ Malingsia”. Kalau dah macam tu, kadang-kadang kitorang dapat SMS cakap Ahad ni jangan keluar kosan, ada demo kat Pangdam(bus-station). Batallah rencana makan aiskrim aku pada Ahad itu. Naik angkot, kena jeling-jeling. Rasa nak bagi penumbuk sebijik kat dia tapi apakan daya. Nak pakai baju kurung pun takut. Takut jadik apa-apa.

Tak cukup stereotyping kat Indonesia, balik Malaysia setereotyping terus berlangsung. Balik Malaysia nanti, ‘rekan2 kolega’ akan berkata “you grad dari Indonesia ke?” sambil memberikan pandangan sinis. Then, kalau ada pasien (ataupun kat Malaysia dipanggil pesakit):

“Dokter, saya sakit perut.”

“Sakit kat maner?”

Si pesakit terdiam seketika sambil berfikir “Laa. dokter ni orang Melayu ke.Ingatkan orang Cina, muka Cina. Membazir duit aku je datang.”

Kutuk orang Melayu (maklum la, org Melayu takdelaa pandai-pandai sangat pun), tak sedar kau tu pun Melayu jugak…

I wonder if I’m still single because I’m a Malaysian or if I’m single because I’m too pretty that I looked intimidating. I’d rather think it was because of the latter reason.

You see, racism is everywhere. I admit it, I’m racist. I can’t help but thinking ’swine flu’ everytime a Caucasian passes by. I can’t help but dancing the typical Indian dance while imagining I’m at this one big field whenever C’s ring tone fills the air. And I can’t help but say “Hey L,your cousin…” whenever I see a lot of Chinese in a place. But, why make a big deal out of it? Opps, I just disrupted the typical Malay-Chinese-Indian sequence of Malaysian art of chronology.

You’re a goddamn hypocrite if you say you’re not racist. Either that or you’re gay.

I LOVE Indonesia. It’s my 2nd home. I love the people. I love the culture. I love love love Nasi Padang. I even learn Sundanese language to have the attention of an Indonesian guy and so I can say “Punten bu, teu terang. Abdi urang Malaysia, bu.” whenever someone asked me the way to the Radiology Department at the hospital.

Why must we make a mountain out of a mole hill?Let’s all live in peace along with a healthy dosage of racism if we must.

Some time ago, my friend asked about this one band, Estranged. She thought it was an Indonesian band because the music was good. It was so good that she didn’t think it was a Malaysian band. You see, she was praising you guys, the Indonesians. You make good musics. Be proud of it. 

Bukanlah nak memburuk-burukkan negara sendiri,tapi hal kecil macam ni tak payah besar-besarkan.Dari dulu sampai sekarang, Malaysia dan Indonesia selalu gaduh pasal benda yang sama. Apalagi kalau kat hospital makin terasa stereotyping.It’s oke if we can all laugh about it.And anyway, kerja di RS dah cukup stressing so lets not get carried away with stuffs like this. It can increase stress level and mortality level you know… 

So, for the sake of peace and love (lebay…), the next time someone asks me “Kamu orang Malaysia ya?” I’m going to say “Saya cuma orang yang biasa-biasa aja, yang bercita-cita untuk berkeluarga dan memiliki 3 ekor kucing satu hari nanti.” Titik!

I was supposed to be at the orthopaedic ward at 0600 on the Wednesday morning of 10th June 2009. Instead I was just turning off my alarm.
After, me and the groupmates were to attend the on-call morning report where we were to sit in front of the conference room listening to orthopaedic cases and pretended to understand what the residents were discussing. Being an airhead that I am, I gave up paying attention and wander my mind off to someplace else.

I was supposed to go to ‘bimbingan’ with our perceptor but because I was back at my room sleeping carelessly while my cellphone was charging its battery, I was late 2 hours. TWO FRIGGIN” HOURS!!!

Oppss!…It was useless to show up after being late for about half a century so I didn’t show up at all and spent my time thinking up of an excuse of why I didn’t come to the ‘bimbingan’. With this, I would like to thank Lyana for giving me the ‘diarrhoea idea’. Applause!

There was Apley’s reading untill about 1730. It hasn’t even started yet when I started complaining of why we should be coming to the event. We could just read it ourselves. Besides, just because it was discussed by the orthopaedic residents, doesn’t mean we learn a greater deal than when we’re doing it ourselves……
Okay, so we do.

…and the residents were taking their time in diagnosing ‘Mr.Bone’s’ (the skeleton model that couldn’t be put in a straight-up position) which, by you know I assume were just jokes.

I must admit, I was actually enjoying the moments because it means that I got to go to my night shift later than the rest of the group and with a good excuse - “koas orto”. It also means, I got to sit down longer comparatively.

I arrived at the emergency department at 1815 and it was a rainy night - which predicts pretty much how the emergency ward would be like for the night. I presume that emergency surgery wasn’t for me because I’ll get all grumpy when there was a lot of things to be done in a jiff. Apart from that, I’ll get pretty moody when the patients complain about the empty Ringer Lactate solution, or when the IV line (God, the ever friggin IV line) stopped and you were to make it work again, or when the patients said they wanted to go peepee and you see no urine catheter sticking out from their you-know-what….

But it was different with the surgery residents. I’ll be preposterously apathic. They can shout all they want, they can be all grumpy with me if they want and I can just sit (or stand if I was feeling polite enough) there and say “Ga tau, dok. Bukan saya yang megang pasien itu” (Dunno, doc. I’m not responsible for that patient) while they look frantically as if they’ll get their eyes on tha status if only they keep turning their heads vigorously while stopping occasionally to stare at you long enough to give you the chill.

I was supposed to sent my petient for Roentgen photo but they put up the ‘cooling-down’ sign outside the X-ray room (reportedly until 0100am). Hummm, despite the rains there wasn’t as much patients and the X-ray machine still needed to be ‘cooling-down’? I don’t really care if it was really true or not. Sometimes (which is most of the time) we use it as an excuse to take a break from doing the tasks.
So, I went to the mesko (or on-call room) and slept carelessly leaving my patients unattended at the emergency ward…
and when I woke up, it was already 0430 in the morning.

Oppsss! I did it again.

The emergency were calm when I showed up(late again for the second time) with the resident doctors sleeping at around the table except for dr.R, the doctors who keep screaming at you if he wants your favor. I usually just shout back at him. He won’t believe your excuse when the X-rays result wasn’t out yet or when he asked you to go check for the patien’t blood test result on the computer at the nurse station and the best thing to do is to say- sorry- to shout “Beneran dok. Kalau ga percaya dok pergi aja lihat sendiri.”

Oh, and amidst the busy-ness my groupmate sms-ed to say that our perceptor asked her again about why I dindn’t come to the ‘bimbingan’ that afternoon. Oh, well. I guess I have to apologize to him in person.

I managed to get to back to my room before 0630 this morning…Took a bath, even get to wash my hair. After, there was morning report at 0700 which was cancelled. After having breakfast, we went to the operating room(OR) to see a procedure on a close fracture at regio tibia dextra.
The resident who couldn’t keep his eyes of my legs offered me to become his assistant and it was pretty assuring the way he said it. But even if he meant it, I’m not sure this stick figure is strong enough for a man’s work…
There wasn’t much to see. It was all practical. Besides, I was taking cover behind a resident since the surgery requires X-ray machine to be turned on 87.384% of the time. When it feels like it gets boring, I started snapping pictures or singing to Rihanna or Beyonce or whatever song echoing through the OR at the time.

Despite the illegal 4 and a half-hour sleep last night, I still went to the oncall room that midday and slept my way through. The bed was uninviting but it gets irresistable at times. Was late…again!…for bimbingan. But I was only 30 minutes late. That was an improvement right?I was 75% less late compared to the previous ‘bimbingan’. And since the residents had a basketball/football match that afternoon, we get to go back earlier.

What luck!

So today we killed our time in the pediatric immunology polyclinic.

I have nothing better to do than do some sketching on my SLE note I made. I love, love Prudie’s black dress in the movie Jane Austen Book Club, so I sketched it. Then when I’m done with it, I sketched Sindy’s face because he has a very obvious face shape. I’ll scan it later when i have the time.

Anyhoo, he suddenly asked “dah bisa masuk OK? Ga nyasar lagi?”

“Ga.”

……

“Eh? Emang kita pernah barengan di OK, gitu?”

“Ya iyalah.”

OMG! Do not tell me…

“Kamu ko-ass anestesi waktu itu ya? Yang pake masker?”

“Iya. Yang waktu itu SC bayinya susah dikeluarin.”

OMG. That was an embarassing moment because it was my first time going to the operating room, and I lied about my sterile scrubs, and I have no idea about the procedures…

Oh, well…at least I don’t go red when I’m embarassed…

I crave for the simplicity in life.

…why some girls take photos with the pursed lips pose.

It’s okay if it’s only in 1 or 2 photos, but every single one of them photos?

Reality check, it doesn’t make you look sexy as you’ve probably intended. You look stupid and still ugly as ever.

Have some creativity. Smiling won’t kill.

If you really do have emphysema, go to a doctor.

[Name]says “Marriage is an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master”!!!!! haha!!!

This is what get my nerves when I opened my facebook account today.

“Well, then don’t get married you dumbhead!” I already typed those words in but decided to keep it peaceful with him. So, I didn’t hit the Enter button.

I don’t think I like it when people make fun of marriage. Marriage is a BIG thing and I don’t think of it as something you can take lightly or made jokes about.

Now you must know, I’m nowhere near married life. I don’t even have a boyfriend. I don’t think I’m ready to take on such a heavy responsibility. Surrendering your freedom is a big sacrifice and I really, really respect those who did. Marriage is the biggest thing you can do to your partner, because it’s a lifetime decision.

I was constantly worrying about when I will get married because I was always thinking about when I’m gonna have kids, the biological clock ticking, the increased risk of chromosomal abnormalities once you hit 30s, all that stuffs. But then a friend of mine posted a note on ‘Jodoh‘. It was a really good post. So, if you have the time, read it.

There are three things:

1. Inconsistency
2. Plotholes
3. Bad acting

1.   Inconsistency

          The thing that make you say “WTH?” more frequently towards the end of the movie. Me and my friends went to see a Thai horror flick Alone once and its a horror flick turned thriller flick as the chick turned from being a victim of supernatural’s harrasment to a psycho killer. Another example is (unfortunately another Thai film, they probably are just that lousy at it) The Victim which is actually a story within a story within a story.

 ”Huh?!”

And, understand when some people hated movies that ends with ‘…Movie’ (i.e Date Movie, Horror Movie, Superheroes Movie, etc). I never get their storyline no matter how hard I try. Besides, that’s really a dirty way to make money. Like, really!

2.    Plotholes

          I’m gonna go for Harry Potter on this one because I’m a fan of Back to the Future and just because.

This is actually a problem in most movies that contain time machines. The movie treats time travel like this urgent thing: “We’ve made it to the past! Now we’ve only got a few minutes to go back and stop the dementors!” No you don’t, you have as much time as you need. It’s fucking time travel. If you mess up, just go back and try again.

“OK, thirty-seventh attempt…”

They also seem to feel that they have to do it immediately, that there’s no time to wait. Of course there’s time to wait, you’ve got a goddamn time machine. Do it tomorrow, do it in ten years. You already know you’ve succeeded, you were there when it happened. It’s actually the only situation you could be in where failure is impossible. It’s the least suspenseful thing imaginable, yet they treat it as the nail-biting climax of the movie.

We’re picking on Harry Potter especially for this because after they use the time machine that one time, that was it. For the rest of the saga, the entire wizarding world is under siege from a magical Hitler, and they never again find the time travel useful? Despite all the people who die in the Harry Potter series (and post Azkaban, they start killing them off like it’s a Friday the 13th movie) he never goes back and saves any of them?

Selfish prick.

-Cracked-

3.     Bad acting

This is a movie with a combination of no.1 and no.3. Enjoy the trailer by clicking on the link below.

C Me Dance

There goes my long weekend. The Indonesians are going to have their elections so we actually had 4 days off…I’d get to sleep late until the afternoon but instead I have 2 days of jaga.

                I’m growing sick of this. It felt like I’ve spent more time sleeping at the hospital than I do at my own bed. I’m draining out my energy and I can’t really recall what I’ve learned in the past weeks. My ‘love’ life(if you ever call it a love life anyway) is…well, there’s no story, just some gossips. I’m sick of my working surroundings (OMG, can you believe the heat at the pediatric ward? It’s a sauna!) not to mention one of the consultant interrogated me during lecture today (Apa definisi asma? Bisa bahasa Indonesia? kamu orang Malaysia? Kamu lagi sakit?) in front of the whole friggin’ class, and I am wishing so hard that I’ll pass pediatric because it tortures me to spend another minute in it. I wish my hair is a little bit longer, so I could tie it up in a bun.Just a wee bit longer. So please, any of you reading this, stop me from cutting my hair. Don’t let me peek into Agyness Deyn’s photos. My colleagues are okay. I’m getting used to them. Four weeks more, four weeks more. And my acnes, they’re popping up like mushrooms and I can find no time to go to the salon and get myself a facial treatment. My handphone’s batteries are having a shorter life-span.

I’ve been having trouble sleeping at night lately so I’m constantly acting like a zombie in the daytime with my eyelid drooped so that it looks like I have a bilateral Facial nerve palsy. Thank goodness they have the on-call room and ‘ruko’ or ruang koas. I was jaga-ing at the pediatric ward last week when I suddenly thought of quitting this department…I won’t of course. I’m a lot tougher than you’d think…hopefully…Besides, It’s been 4 weeks. I’m halfway through now. Half! That is a milestone of great significance. The morning after, I was supposed to (continue) stay at the pediatric ward, but I was so sleepy. So instead I slept at the oncall room next to where someone had left two 5cc needle syringes and two tubes meant for some patients blood. I slept well until noon despite a message demanding me to come back to the ward. Nope, don’t wanna. And it wasn’t like they needed me there. Co-ass is practically useless. We do nurses’ job.

          Last night, I cought up with Wil and I whined about how I won’t answer to my head of the group on showing up earlier to follow up the patients. He counterfeited it by saying “blah blah blah, siap-siap di bagian bedah…blah blah…jam 5“. You see, the thing about him is that he always have something to say to counterfeit my statement and he’s always, always, always right. How I hated him for that. Shame on me.

          And this morning, this morning I slept in the ruko until break. And I fell asleep early the night before…

                Just now, I opened the laptop that isn’t fully mine (not even half-fully mine) and after a while of clicking the ‘Refresh’ button to see if there’s any new newsfeed.I stopped and continue to do what I do sometimes when I have so much free time (I rarely have free time but I always pretend that I do – It appears to be one of the ‘Procrastinators Oath’) that is catching up with Nisa’s blog. Life is just too generous to her. It’s cliché but I’m gonna say it, anyway. She’s young, she’s beautiful. I like her sense of style and I’m sure I’m not the only one who adores her. She’s currently living in Paris, living her dreams doing the things she liked and she is already making more money than you and I will make – combined – and maybe double it. The closest thing I have been to making my own money? Pulling out my father’s grey hair strands for the price of 1 cent each when I was 8. I managed to get RM1. You might think I’ve pulled 100 grey strands…but I cheated. I only pulled 80 or so strands. Forgive me, dad.

                                So, how do I deal with all these? Should I move to Hollywood and pursue my dream of becoming a rock-star/actress/singer appearing occasionally in MTV’s Crib or MTV’s stupid Punked? The best thing to do is to bear it like I always did.

Remember.

Halfway through.

.

.

.

.

It seems that everybody’s homesick now. Maybe it’s that time of the year, where everyone gets homesick. Is there such a thing?

          I just watched a commercial break on an animation called ‘The Life and times of Tim’ and I think that the art of animation is getting lamer by the minute despite the fact that the technology has evolved  exponentially since the Y2K bug drained the life of computer nerds around the world in the year 1999.

          I watched Dragon Ball last night with a good friend of mine, Wil. He wanted to watch Push. I wanted to watch either Push or Fast & Furious because of the good reviews coming from everybody. But there was no Push and Fast & Furious’ tickets were sold out. So we ended up watching that lame movie. It wasn’t that bad but it wasn’t that good either.

          And just now, I watched the TV on how a guy lost his thumb while feeding an eel. Apparently, the eel thought his finger looked tastier and decided that maybe he’ll give it a bite…okay then, a wee bite maybe? Well, the guy got his thumb replaced with the second digit of his left foot. Needless to say, It made his hands looked freaky.